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Hi, internet. You may have noticed that I don’t really post much here anymore. That’s because I have roughly 18 other blogs that I post on more frequently. YEP. I’ve actually moved this blog over to my personal domain, so if you’d like to keep up with my nonsense, here’s a handy dandy list of places to find me:

I’m not gonna delete this blog, mostly cos I don’t know how, but also cos I don’t have a good reason to until I become embarrassed by this WAHAHAH. Yeah. But it was fun posting here for a while and I hope you’ll follow me on one of the many other places where I blog.



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I’m aware I’m pretty much in the minority on this one, but I love the everloving crap out of this movie. I have a thing for ensemble casts (Anthony Hopkins! Nick Cannon! Joshua Jackson!) and period pieces and historical events, so combine the three and you have my dream movie.

Also, the scene with Shia LeBeouf and Ashton Kutcher just demolished on LSD is hilarious.

My favorite scene is the bit in the kitchen, where Laurence Fishburne is talkin’ about his cobbler to the Mexican dude:

“See, the first few times I tried to make this dessert, I couldn’t get it right. Too much sugar one time, not enough sugar the next time — couldn’t find the balance. I realized I was forcing it. I was trying to make it taste like my Mama’s or her Mama’s. Mine didn’t have any poetry, didn’t have any light.

And then I realized I was trying to force it to taste like my mother’s, taste like her mother’s. See, it had to be Edward’s creation. It had to come from me.

Now you, Miguel. You’ve got shit to offer. You have no poetry, you have no light.

You’ve got no one looking at you and saying, ‘Damn, look at that Miguel. I want some of what he’s got.’ All you got is your anger.”

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Okay, fine, not so mysterious considering everyone knows about it. But anyway here’s the new episode of The Hawtline with TWIGBy and me and our awesome guest, and I hope you enjoy! Thanks to everyone who contributed questions this week.

And I’m sorry that we talk a lot about boners, okay? I apologize.


Music featured in this episode includes:
  • N.A.S.A. by Futurecop
  • Train in Vain by The Clash
  • People Got a Lotta Nerve by Neko Case

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YO GUYS. It’s THE HAWTLINEEEE WOOOOOHOO. I somehow conned TWIGBy into being my ever-present co-host (I may have offered him fruit snacks. Or I may have just made that up.) and we took questions from the public for COMBUSTIBLE MONKEY who was just delightful.

And it’s about time considering I actually interviewed him roughly one year ago and never actually produced the show. BURIED PODCAST OH MYYY.

Anyhow, enjoy The Hawtline:


[the song featured at the beginning is Patagonia by Diamond J and the Rough.]

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Ok hi guys. I hadn’t done a show in a while so I have this TWIGBy EXCLUSIVE. I know normally I throw The Hawtline in a regular episode of On The Mic, but this particular episode was too massive and too hilarious so it had to be set apart on it’s own. So really, there’s no tracklist or anything, it’s just the Hawtline.


I had fun with that show. You can find TWIGBy on OkCupid (UGH) under the username the_wayigetby, or over on his blog, at continuousfire.wordpress.com.

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Someone asked me tonight for the recipe to a dinner I made a couple weeks ago. I figured if I was gonna type up the recipe, which came from my AMAZING Delicious Disney cookbook (which is lovely. I got it at the park for $40 so I don’t know why it’s selling for so much more online, but whatever, its a great book with LOTS of lovely photos and yummy recipes), I’d might as well post it here for everyone.

Fried Green Tomatoes with Crab Meat & Asiago Cheese


  • 5 small green tomatoes
  • 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 5 large eggs, beaten
  • 2 1/2 cups panko bread crumbs
  • 1/2 cup olive oil
  • coarse salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste
  • 1 cup lump crab meat
  • 1 1/4 cups grated Asiago cheese
  • Parmesan Cheese (optional)
  • 15 fresh basil leaves, thinly sliced
  • 25 tarragon leaves, thinly sliced
  • 1/2 cup thinly sliced red bell pepper
  • 1/2 cup thinly sliced red onion
  • 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
  • 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
  • Balsamic Reduction (recipe follows)

(One tomato usually equals 1 serving, so this is enough for five)

  1. Peel the tomatoes with a vegetable peeler and slice 1/2 inch thick
  2. Coat tomato slices in flour, then egg, then panko bread crumbs. [I didn’t have any panko so for I used just regular ole seasoned breadcrumbs. It was still pretty yummy. If you use panko, I like to season it with a little bit of italian spices and salt and pepper. Mmmm. Also, for EXTRA DECADENCE, I like to mix the bread crumbs with the Parmesan cheese, and it comes out SOOO GOOD.]
  3. Heat the olive oil in a saute pan. Fry the toato slices on both sides until golden.
  4. Season with salt and pepper, if needed.
  5. Lay the tomato slices in a baking pan and top with crab meat and asiago cheese. [Personally, I find the taste of Asiago to be too strong, so you can either substitute it for a cheese you like better, or use VERY little]
  6. Broil 2-3 minutes or until the cheese is fully melted.
  7. Stack the layers of tomatoes on top of each other.
  8. Toss the basil, tarragon, peppers, onions, olive oil, and vinegar together. Season with salt and pepper to taste and set aside.
  9. Place the tomato stack on a plate. Drizzle balsamic reduction over the tomatoes and top with salad.

Balsamic Reduction:

  1. In a small saucepan over medium heat, reduce the vinegar by 75%.
  2. Stir in honey. Set aside until the sauce is a thick consistency

[When made right, the balsamic reduction is REALLY good and just a little bit compliments the tomatoes perfectly. Unfortunately, because I cannot have a major disasterfree dinner, when I re-heated the reduction to make leftovers the next day, it BURNED and DESTROYED my leftover tomatoes. So definitely be careful. Ugh. I am so not a professional cook, obviously.]




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